By law, all media companies are required to provide some sort of Christmas (or lower tier holiday) seasonal coverage during the month of December. It’s as stupid and arbitrary a law as Canada’s “Canadian content” quotas but them’s the breaks. So here, vaguely fulfilling the requirement, are two sexual Youtube Christmas videos by Internet superstar MajelaZeZeDiamond. If only the real Santa Claus was as cool as MajelaZeZeDiamond (who describes herself as “queen of sex, queen of commando, queen of pussy”), than maybe Christmas would be a holiday people other than greedy 4 year olds and consumer sheep enjoy.

Also, since it can be hard to understand what MajelaZeZeDiamond is saying at all times, the respective lyrics are included below both videos. “Christmas Pussy Song” and “Christmas Vagina Song” are very different and should never be confused for one another, but here is the explanation MajelaZeZeDiamond gives for both videos.

“This is a vagina (pussy) awareness public service announcement; this is one of the songs that I have written. I hope that you enjoy listening to it.”

There you have it folks. Merry Christmas from MajelaZeZeDiamond and F*Bomb.

Father Christmas fucked my pussy (Christmas pussy song)

Vagina, vagina, vagina, vagina, oh,
Vagina, vagina, eh
Christmas pussy, pussy
Vagina, vagina, vagina, vagina, oh,
Vagina, vagina, eh
Christmas jiggy, jiggy

Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy,
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy,
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy

Father Christmas, lover boy!
Come over here, give me your dick
Dip it in, in my cunt,
Dip it in, in my cunt

Father Christmas, lover boy!
Dip your dicky in my cunt
Dip your dicky in my cunt

Vagina, vagina, vagina, vagina, oh
Vagina, vagina, eh
Christmas pussy, pussy
Vagina, vagina, vagina, vagina, oh
Vagina, vagina, eh
Christmas jiggy, jiggy

Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy,
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy,
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy

Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy,
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy,
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy
Father Christmas fuck my pussy, fuck, fuck my pussy

This is Christmas,
We gonna have lots of sex
This is Christmas,
We gonna have lots of sex
This is Christmas,
We gonna have lots of sex
This is Christmas,
We gonna have lots of sex

Father Christmas, lover boy!
I’m here, I’m over here

Dip your penis in my pussy,
Dip your penis in my pussy,
Dip your penis in my pussy

Father Christmas, lover boy!
Cool!

Santa ate my pussy (Christmas vagina song)

Merry, merry Christmas,
Merry wet vagina
Merry, merry Christmas,
Merry pussy time
Merry, merry Christmas,
Merry wet vagina
Merry, merry Christmas,
Merry pussy time
Smell of penis in the air,
smell of pussy every where
Smell of sex in the air,
We are gonna doggie and missionary

Santa give me your penis,
I’m gonna give you my pussy
Smell of sex in the air,
We gonna doggie and missionary

Santa come down the chimney,
Your mistletoe
Eat my Vagina,
Lick my vagina
Sniff my vagina,
Your Christmas lunch
Oh, oh, oh, oh

Santa come down the chimney,
Your mistletoe
Eat my Vagina,
Lick my vagina
Sniff my vagina,
your Christmas lunch
Oh, oh, oh, oh

Shakey, shakey, shakey, shakey, shakey, shakey, shake your bum bum,
Shakey, shakey, shakey, shakey, shakey, shakey, shake your bum bum

Okay! Santa, come over here,
Fuck my pussy
Fuck my pussy,
Fuck my pussy
Fuck it hard,
Fuck it hard
Fuck it hard,
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck
Santa, fuck my pussy deeper, deeper, deeper, faster, harder

I love your penis; it’s big, it’s long, it’s hard,
Thank you, Santa
Ah, ah, all right

Santa come down the chimney,
Your mistletoe
Eat my Vagina,
Lick my vagina
Sniff my vagina,
your Christmas lunch
Oh, oh, oh, oh

Santa come down the chimney,
Your mistletoe
Eat my Vagina,
Lick my vagina
Sniff my vagina,
your Christmas lunch
Oh, oh, oh, oh

Majela… queen of sex, queen of commando, queen of pussy
Go girl, ah, ah, ah
Santa, penetrate deep, fuck me harder, fuck my pussy,
Santa, merry Christmas
Fuck me harder, harder, harder, harder, harder!
Eh! yeah

Oh, merry, merry Christmas,
Merry wet vagina
Merry, merry Christmas,
Merry pussy time
Smell of penis in the air,
Smell of pussy everywhere
Smell of sex in the air,
We gonna doggie and missionary

Santa come down the chimney,
Your mistletoe
Eat my Vagina,
Lick my vagina
Sniff my vagina,
your Christmas lunch
Oh, oh, oh, oh

Santa come down the chimney,
Your mistletoe
Eat my Vagina,
Lick my vagina
Sniff my vagina,
your Christmas lunch
Oh, oh, oh, oh

Santa, pussy eater!