According to a hastily done informal survey conducted by F*Bomb, the most popular blogs on the Internet are about cupcakes. That’s bullshit. Isn’t sex supposed to be the driving force behind the world wide web? Why would anyone want to read about cupcakes? Cupcakes, quite frankly, suck. Everyone knows pie is superior to cake and cupcakes are just shitty little cakes that you have to unwrap before you eat them. They’re supposed to be what you bake for the birthday of your least favorite child, not some Twitter trending gourmet gojii berry hobby.
Still, F*Bomb is in the blog business for purely profit based motivations and we would be slacking on our shareholder obligations if we didn’t at least try and stay somewhat on top of the current cyber-fads. That’s why we have a Dilbert comic hanging in the office and we always link to those adorable LOLcats photos. So since we’re so cool and hip and in-the-Internet-know, F*Bomb is now going to incorporate more cupcake type content into the blog.
But what is it about cupcakes that makes middle aged morons hip young urban professionals go nuts over them? It can’t be the taste or packaging, because that shit so obviously sucks. So it must be the sprinkles, right? Aside from cream cheese based frosting, sprinkles are the only redeeming element involved in the creation of a cupcake. Fortunately, for both F*Bomb’s pervy readers and fad focused shareholders, sex and sprinkles go together fairly well. Below are some hot, sexy, sprinkley pics that should turn you on, make you hungry, and boost F*Bomb’s Google searchability rating by a couple notches.
Also, please tell all your friends about F*Bomb, Twitter us like crazy, and link back to us on your own sad, pathetic cupcake blogs, before we’re forced to become an iPad app review blog with zany “Box the Monkey to Win a Zune” banner ads.
Darn, the problem with relying on us middle aged morons is that we’re so last year. Of course, this is just a selfish heads up, since “pie” has so much potential.
Yours is one of my favorite blog discoveries of 2010. Merry Fuckmas.
Glad to hear you’re digging the F*Bomb Freida. We plan on stepping our game up hard in 2011. That means leading the trends, not following fads that Yahoo has already picked up on. So forget pies (so passe), we’re already moving on to erotic quiches #eroticquiche2011