After the still operational Space Jam website, amateur pornography is probably the coolest thing going on online. Across the web, ordinary people are fucking, sucking, and baring all for the world to see. Thanks to the wonderful advances of the modern world, the whole of humanity can now gaze upon the delightfully candid dirty pictures that were once the private pleasure of photo development techs. Unlike the barren rented mansion backdrops of mainstream pornography, amateur smut is cluttered with the intimate details of real life. Just gaze past the “raunchy milf sucking hubbie’s cock” and you’ll see whatever reading material occupies this frisky couple’s nightstand. It’s a voyeur’s paradise.
These Kodak moments capture vacation zucchini insertions and college co-ed sex parties, but they never tell the whole story. Who are these people? How did their private smut collections end up on the Internet? Why did they decide to buy a zucchini on the way back to the hotel and take some dirty pics with it? These questions could drive a person mad.
While Google image searching “teenage pee party” the other day (see previous post), F*Bomb discovered the delightful urolagnia fansite, Peegalleries.net. Divided into specific categories such as Squat, Toilet, Shower, Sink, etc., PeeGalleries is home to over “21000 of 100% real images of peeing nubile chicks – sudden photos made by their friends and roommates in the most delicate moments and in the most unexpected places.” But unlike deliberate watersports porn, all of these girls are in otherwise non-sexual situations, just peeing and having a grand old time with their peeing buddies, not fretting at all about the person with the camera in the room.
Though girls are notorious for peeing in packs, F*Bomb had no idea what fun ladies were having behind closed bathroom doors (or squatting in someone’s yard as the case might be). What kind of night leads you to be out with your gals, peeing in public, and giving a big old grin to the friend taking pictures of you with your pants down? Why isn’t F*Bomb invited to these parties, aside from the fact that we’re horribly rude albino shut-ins with crippling night blindness? We might never know who these girls are, why they’re having such an awesome time peeing, or why someone decided this was a sweet photo opportunity, but we can still imagine. Below are F*Bomb’s favorite super fun pee photos from PeeGalleries.net, and brief hypotheses about what might have been going on beyond the photos frame.
SQUAT
Trisha, the girl with the jeans around her thighs, is from St. Cloud, MI. She cheated on her boyfriend Mark, the guy holding the camera, three times in the year that they dated, though he only found out about the final affair. This picture was taken two months in, when they were walking home after a night out on the town with some of Mark’s co-workers. Trisha has never been shy and since she was basically greyed out from vodka Red Bulls at this point, she didn’t give a fuck about Mark flashing his camera at her while she stopped to squat in the park. Mark tried to get her to give him a quick blowjob a few minutes after this photo, but Trisha refused.
Rachel (pee-er), and her best friend Sara (photographer), are UPenn students (Communications and English majors respectively) who got fed up with the bathroom line at the Delta Sigma Epsilon party they were attending and walked over to the neighbor’s side yard to pee. Sara peed first and was supposed to be look out but decided to take a photo instead. Rachel didn’t care at the time, but drunkenly asked Sara to delete this photo later in the night. Sara obviously decided not to. Two hours after this photo was taken, these girls won a surprising upset victory in a game of beer pong.
TOILET
Karen (on toilet), Claire (tub), and Rebecca (photographer) have been drinking box wine and dancing to Youtube videos of 90s pop songs since 10PM. It’s now 2:34AM. Karen is a grad student and really likes it when her boyfriends chokes her while they’re having sex. Claire waitresses at a Pizzeria Uno’s and threw up in the toilet Karen is sitting on at a party at this apartment two weeks ago.
Brianna (pee-er) is on a road trip to Florida from upstate New York with her boyfriend Kent, his brother Matt, and her friend Daniel (photographer). This was the first day of the trip and Daniel surprised Bri (as her friends call her) on the toilet inside a Flying J. Matt masturbates to the idea of fucking Brianna, his brother’s girlfriend, in the ass almost daily.
URINAL
Cassie (pee-er) does not remember this photo being taken. Cassie and Laura (photographer) snuck into the men’s room of the bar to pee just before last call. Cassie is mad at her boyfriend Derick (cellphone), because he is back in Iowa visiting his family and she knows he is hanging out with his ex-girlfriend, Liz. Derrick is hanging out with Liz, as well as some mutual friends, and is standing outside on the balcony of their apartment, trying to calm his drunk girlfriend down. Cassie made out with one of the Derrick’s friends last night and feels guilty about it, which is partially why she is being such a bitch and a drunken mess tonight.
Amanda (pee-er) and Jordan (girl/photographer) are dirty pee sluts who love having hot sexy pee parties in men’s bathrooms. These slutty college bitches love to pee and get peed on and drink pee and touch pee and they drink so much water they always have to pee and having to pee turns them on. These dirty piss whores are always peeing and having sex while they pee and using mouths for toilets and toilets for mouths. Right after this photo was taken, a bunch of dudes came in the bathroom and peed on them and they peed on the dudes and then everyone had sex in the pee. It was hot.
